Ask Leo - Dog Advice From A Doodle -
Why Do Dog Toys Look Lke Sex Toys?
I love it when my owners take me to the dog boutique to pick out treats and toys, but lately something has been freaking me out. There are lots of bones that look too much like what humans call “adult toys.” Some of them are so lewd-looking that I get embarassed when we walk by them. Leo, do you know why humans would want to buy dog toys that look like this? I am always afraid my humans will buy me one and then when my friends come over, they will see it in my toy box and make fun of me.
“Mortified” in Maine*
*To protect the identity of the dogs and humans involved in this letter, names and
locations have been changed.
My owner and I did a special reconnaisance trip to investigate what you are talking about. Let me tell you, I thought she had brought me to the Hustler Store in Hollywood, but actually we were at our neighborhood dog store near downtown Los Angeles! The photo
below illustrates what we found.
I couldn’t decide what was dirtier in this dog bone section – the giant “Galileo” (why is there a picture of a pirate on it, btw?), the orange and purple “puppy double action” bones with special bumps, or the flesh colored one that you can just see a bit of above them.
Let me tell you Mortified, I’ve been scratching my head with my back feet all day thinking about this one. The best I can come up with is 1. people are crazy (but you already knew that) and 2. people want their dogs to have doggy-versions of whatever they are buying for themselves or the miniature humans in their lives (hence doggy strollers, dog sneakers, and Paul Mitchell dog shampoo – which my owner just bought for me the other day.)
That being said, Mortified, maybe you should just relax about it. These things are great for chewing! If I were you, I’d just hide my Galileo under the couch when my friends came over.
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